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Thinking possibility versus thinking constraints

A few years back, I had two reportees working with me in a team. Both were hi-potential and had reached this level with good feedback.

This was the time they could both have scaled to head the team - because the team was under me for a short duration - almost as a transition, until one of them could take over. But the catch was that only one could lead the team. It was difficult. A was very good with data, made zero mistakes at work and was very reliable. B was equally good with data, very diligent and reliable. On the face of it very little to choose from. 

But over a few interactions, I realised one big difference. 

Whenever I went to A with a situation and a possible solution - A only saw constraints. Why something cannot be done, why something had to be done only in one particular way or why this was something we had to live it. All in all a pretty draining conversation - filled with "no, but". 

Whenever I went to B with a situation and a possible solution - B saw possibilities. Why something could be tried, why we could try out different methods and why something could be changed/tweaked/seen in a different way. All in all in a pretty energetic conversation - filled with "yes, and".

We chose B to the eventual leader of the group. And as we speak about 9 odd years later - A has not grown much, but B has grown much faster.  

The power of thinking in possibilities instead of thinking in constraints. 


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